NO SEX AND THE CITY <3

Maybe its just me, but I feel like where ever I turn everything is saturated and dripping with sex. Thats just how our society is. A lot of times, from the world of celebrity. All the hook ups, scandals, cheating, etc. America seems to be so enthralled by a good scandal. However, all celebrities don’t fit that mold. There are a lot of celebrities who have also abstained at some point. Heres a list of some of my fellow virgins (or were at some point):

JONAS BROTHERS: All of them have made the commitment to abstain til marriage. All have promise rings. Recently, the oldest, Kevin, was married and they now have their own show on E!

TIM TEBOW: Probably the most well known one at the moment. I commend his efforts to stay strong in such a difficult environment like the one hes in, and being that hott! No, but seriously- I know how hard it is, and can only imagine someone of his celebrity having to abstain.

LOLO JONES: Another current famous virgin. Although, Lolo isn’t getting flack for that right now. I still think she did amazing in the olympics and she is amazing all around. Definitely an inspiration!! Not to mention, shes beautiful! Lolo said, “There’s virgins out there and I want to let them know that it’s the hardest thing I’ve ever done in my life. Harder than training for the Olympics. Harder than graduating from college has been to stay a virgin before marriage. I’ve been tempted, I’ve had plenty of opportunities.”

ADRIANA LIMA: Not sure if everyone knows this or not. Alot of people would probably assume in her profession that wasn’t the case. She reportedly said “Sex is for marriage,[Men] have to respect that this is my choice. If there’s no respect, that means that they don’t want me.” And waited. She wed at 27.

JESSICA SIMPSON: I think everyone knows she waited until marriage with Nick Lachey. That gives me hope! Other than that, I am not really a fan of Jessica Simpson, just saying. Jessica once said, “Of all the things about myself, staying a virgin until my wedding night is the thing that makes me most proud.”

JORDIN SPARKS: From American Idol.”It’s hard everyday, but I made a promise to myself. Temptation is always there. It’s all about making the right choice and not putting yourself in that situation.”

TINA FEY: One of my biggest inspirations-to-date. Apparently, Tina waited til 24 to give it up. She was with her current husband (not married, but I still consider that a lot of strength!!). Tina has JOKED it wasn’t all by choice.

A.C. GREEN: Former LA Lakers star and awesome athlete. Still believes in abstinence and works with organizations even now to support it. He stayed a virgin until marriage. “I love that people remember me for that. I took a stand, and I was a voice for a generation. I’m proud of that.”

PHILIP RIVERS: San Diego Chargers quarterback. Was very open about his faith and waiting til marriage in the public eye. Which he did. Guess Tebow wasn’t the first for the NFL.

BETHANY HAMILTON: Everyone probably knows Bethany for her shark attack. And her amazing surfing skills. Bethany has also made a commitment to wait for marriage.

ZAC HANSON: I didn’t know this one! Hanson! Everyone in my generation knows this who they are. He reportedly waited as well! Guess Jonas’ weren’t the first band of brothers either.

So I was catching up on an episode of “16 and Pregnant” the other day.. I have seen many episodes of this show, and almost every single time it freaks me out. Unlike their birth control methods, it never fails! Whether its the all night crying, the fatigue that comes along with that, or the simple fact that these children are having children. I am 24 and NOT pregnant, nor would want to be (at this moment in time). I can’t even try to comprehend what I would do with a child now, let alone at that age!

But besides all the tasks that come with bringing a child into the world, the thing that freaks me out the most is the giving birth part itself. I know they say this is a natural part of life for a woman, but seriously!! I really can’t comprehend how something so big comes out of there??!

I just feel like I’d give birth, then after, there’d be this gaping hole and all of my insides would just fall out.

And the unimaginable pain! Oh, the pain. I keep delaying my dentist appointment for that simple fact alone, and that doesn’t even compare. Also, the insane change it would make on your body. I have body trouble enough without adding that factor! I hope young girls see what I am seeing when I watch this show. Maybe not so dramatically. Or maybe that would be good for them. Pregnancy as I’ve said before is a huge part of why I am abstaining.

One more thing, I really wish if there were shows on television like “16 and Pregnant” that they would show the other side, too. Like “16 and Working to Feed the Homeless” “16 and Trying to Find a Cure for Cancer” or “16 and Trying to Save the World”— ok I know those are dramatic examples. But where are these girls’ inpirations? Young girls need some role models, something to aspire to do, to be. Lets get this going, America. I’m “24 and with a Degree,” from a really good university. I’m “24 and a Virgin”, and yeah, that can be seen as good or bad. But most importantly… I’m “24 and Trying to Make a Difference” for my generation and generations to come!!!

1. Lets start with the obvious (for most people). I come from a Christian background and family. I was raised in a strict and religious household and I’m sure that played more than a significant role in this. It’s my foundation, and has molded me to the person I have become. HOWEVER, I am not the same as my family and believe in many different things that they don’t. And I have made the choice to wait aside from my family and my “religion.” (Sidenote: I don’t necessary believe in “religion”, but I consider myself a Christian and believe in God!) But this is not the sole reason I am waiting, just wanted to make that clear, first and foremost.

2. Pregnancy scares the crap out of me! There is nothing more terrifying to me! I just simply cannot comprehend how something sooo big comes out of there! and I don’t want to know. But I will talk more about pregnancy in my next post.

3. Scared of The Dirty Stuff. STDs of course! Theres just so many of them there. I can’t imagine putting myself at risk like that. Whenever I visit the doctor I freak out about what could be wrong with me, just from the foods I am eating and the exercise im NOT doing. There are such huge risks to my health I am just not willing to take. Why would I want to do that to myself?

Not to preach but here are just some quick facts (thank you Huffington Post!):

• One in two sexually active young people will get an STD by the age of 25.
• Most young people with STDs don’t even know they have them. Getting tested is the only way to know for sure.
• STDs are really common — every year there are more than 19 million new cases in the U.S.
• Left untreated, some STDs can cause infertility or increase your risk of getting cancer
• More than 50 percent of sexually active people will get HPV at some point during their lives.

If you want more specifics, you can check out this article: http://birthcontrolnews.org/std-stats/

4. I’M SCARED. Not just for the afformentioned reasons. I have held out for so long that even if I decided I would give it up today, I would be scared. I would probably run away if a thingy just came flying at me. Or whatever it is that happens.

5. I’m emotionally allergic and scared to sex. At least right now. I guess I have some trust issues. Trust, in the sense that how do you know after giving it up this other person wouldn’t just leave forever? You don’t. I guess you never really know, but you get what I am saying. I mean I could give it up and things could go SO wrong. I know in my heart I only want to be with one person. It’s just not worth anything else to me. I am not going to lie though, its hard and sometimes I question if even I am doing the right thing. I wonder if you ever know if what your doing is right?

6. Hello, I live in New York City. I’ll never forget an episode of the show Weeds where Doug told Silas that NYC is “the F—- center of the UNIVERSE.” Everyone knows how it is here. Imagine living here. Imagine dating here. Imagine being a virgin here. It’s not easy. I can tell you there’s probably no shortage of men here just like anything else. But finding someone single is hard. Finding someone decent is even harder, especially once they know me and know what I’m not offering. The lions den, someone told me once. I’ve moved to the lions den. Not to mention how competive the girls are here. You can read it in some of my stories here if you havent! (See The Lady Doth Protest too much and more). You won’t know what I truly mean unless you have lived here, because these girls are extreme and take it to a whole other level. Think Hunger Games. I just hope I make out like Katniss…

“Things I am doing since I am not having sex” is definitely becoming a new segment of my blog. There’s more to life than sex and guys. Anyway, when I first started this segment I briefly talked about how depressed I felt the horses working the carriages in Central Park were. In turn, making me depressed. Since then, I have joined NYCLASS (NYers for Clean Livable and Safe Streets) the organized committee working to get the horse and carriages out of the park!

The group had its first organized fundraiser the other night, to raise funds for a prototype of a vintage car to replace the horses. I was glad to be able to attend and had a blast! The food, location, silent auction and just everything was awesome. Well except for Kathy Najimy waIking right passed me and not being able to meet an actress I like! Its ok, hopefully next time.

I am just so happy I am not the only one who cares about this and that there is a lot going on! And that there is alot being mobilized to get this done, and get the poor horses out of the city. It really just breaks my heart. I can barely walk down Central Park West or Columbus Circle without stopping and feeling terrible for them.

Anyway, can’t wait to see whats next! If you’d like to help and/or be involvedmessage me!! Also, just wanted to say thanks to Angela Simmons for letting my retarded self take a picture with her! I love her and her family, I look up to them and what they stand for (understandably with this blog I’m doing!). She is so sweet!! <3

I know, I know…  I have been away for quite some time. Months maybe. Who’s counting? Speaking of, I haven’t dated anyone in a while. The last was probably the fireman. I was thinking about it the other day. I was a little smitten by him. But I was thinking how funny it was that one day we just stopped talking, and he was never thought of again (well except for writing this post right now). So it didn’t matter that he was therefore never to be seen again.

Maybe its a sign of maturity? I am not too sure. I have never been over someone SO QUICKLY after having liked them some. Maybe I just realized there was nothing there. Maybe I just realized he was just like the rest of them…

Thats why I haven’t dated (or wrote) in a while. I must say I am so unbelievably  uninspired! As well as so over this city. Alot of things about it, but since we’re on the topic. The guys suck here. At least for someone in my position. I am just so freaking tired of the same ol’ thing. Same ol’ douchebag. Its seriously the same story each time. I get that it’s just the environment here. But its just tiresome and boring at this point.

What a breath of fresh air California was. I was out there visiting for the first time earlier this year and I loved everything about the city, except for the traffic! Everyone was way more laid back and happy. Also, the mountains were incredibly awesome and amazing. All of the nature was actually, especially for someone trapped in the Zoo of New York City. So were all of the guys. The girls too (I’ll talk about that later, though). They were cute, friendly, and more importantly sweet. Not the typical douchey stuck up New Yorker I am used to.

I was telling this to a friend upon returning and still on a California high, and she told me that she’s “been there and done that.” That it didn’t matter if guys were ultra sweet to me because they were being ultra sweet to plenty of other girls as well. Hahaha. But regardless, even that is a nice change than what I am dealing with here. Its hard to understand unless you’ve been in this city. Because I am sure plenty of you think I am exagerrating. Ugh why can’t I just meet Tim Tebow? Haha Just kidding, let me not even go there. Lets just see what new things are to come…

I seriously believe there is no greater feeling in life than laughing, and even more so making someone laugh. Theres nothing I find more important in life than comedy. Well I say that now, but lets not forget I have never had sex haha. Anyway, a couple of weeks ago I had the wonderdul pleasure of seeing Sarah Colonna’s stand up at Gotham Comedy Club in New York City. It’s nights like that, that make it so worth living here. As expected, I was laughing throughout the entire show, and I DON’T blame the alcohol this time. I became a fan of hers when I saw her open for a Chelsea Handler a while back. (I’ll be seeing Chelsea again next week in Los Angeles. And let’s hope the boys in Cali are better!!)

Anyway, after the show I was ecstatic to see a table of books, and more importantly Sarah sitting behind them. I was happy to be able to buy a book. I had wanted to purchase one before the show, but really the only way to do that nowadays is online. RIP Borders. Even that relationship had to die for me too. Nothing new. I was nervous to approach Sarah, but then I was thankful for all the alcohol kicking in. Maybe too much, because I only remember half of the things I said to her. I am sure I made a fool of myself, as I usually do. I do remember how nice she was, and she seemed to be genuine. And she seemed like she was actually listening to my drunken gibberish.

Anyway, it was one of the greatest nights I have had in the city. Not only because of Sarah but also because of the girlfriends I was enjoying it with. Oh, and lets not forget the drinks. Haha, I am just kidding. “I didnt realize yet that it was enough to have good friends. I was searching for what everyone back home told me they already had.” Sarah, I am so thankful for your book!

It was a rainy day, and it was a bad one. I was in a depressed and hopeless mood. Maybe it was the weather, maybe not. I couldn’t seem to get out of bed. It was the first time I had called out from my new job. I really don’t know what was wrong with me that particular day. Atfer some slugging around, I picked up the one thing that I thought was perfect to pick up my mood. A good laugh from Sarah’s book. I didn’t stop reading to the very last period.

All I expected was some good laughs. But I got a lot more than that.. I became an even bigger fan because I felt like I could relate so much. I felt so much better after reading it. I guess I was sad because I felt like I was/am such a mess. Trying to figure everything out. But as I read: “Twenty, five is so young Sarah, you don’t have to have anything figured out.” I felt like these words were being spoken to ME.

I honestly wasn’t expecting there to be so much emotion in a comedian’s book. It was real, she’s cried just like anyone else. She seemed to have been as much of a mess as I am now. Haha. And it made me realize I am not the only one. It gave me hope. As much as I love laughing, I don’t really like to talk about the other spectrum. About the sadness, about the tears. Sarahs book made me more comfortable about it. Omg, I am a girl after all! Haha.

“Too bad the me then couldn’t talk to the me now, who knows one bad night is just that. It doesn’t wipe out all of your good ones.” You are talking to the you then, except its me! And that other girl. And that one whore. And that…. Lol I am just kidding. So thank youuuu. <;3

“You keep going, trying, getting jobs here and there and then finally one day you get the job that changes everything. I suppose its the same way with dating.”